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For many patients, the emotional stress of going through an IVF cycle is far more than the physical stress ! The overriding fear is that of failure – what will I do if the cycle fails ? Will life be worth living ? They understand that IVF is the one treatment option which maximizes their chances of having a baby and have pinned all their hopes and dreams on the cycle succeeding. They dread to entertain the possibility of failure , as a result of which they are emotionally very vulnerable.

Even before starting the IVF cycle, they spend a lot of time and energy doing their homework. Some will do their research and become an expert on IVF; others will doctor shop; while some will go to a temple to make sure God is on their side !

While there are quite a few ups and downs during the moments of truth during an IVF cycle, the fact that there is so much action ( are the follicles growing ? do we have enough eggs ? are the embryos of good quality ?) , the mind is extremely hard to manage during the 2ww , and plays havoc during this time.

While your head knows you should be detached, and that the final outcome is now out of your hands, your heart finds it hard to do this ! You look for omens and signs all the time ! Everyone ( especially your husband ) tells you not to “ stress “ , but how can you possibly not stress about this – after all, so much rides on this ! While your friends are sympathetic and caring, they just cannot understand what you are going through. Every minute seems to take an hour to pass – and you are never sure whether to be hopeful ( because you’ve read somewhere that being positive increases the chances of success ?); or to be prepared for failure ( so that it’s easy to deal with the emotional roller coaster ride). Unfortunately, many doctors make a bad situation worse by forcing their patients on “bed rest” after the embryo transfer. When you lying in bed all day long, it’s hard to stop your mind from imagining the worst !

Unfortunately, there are no reliable symptoms or signs which can predict what the outcome will be. The symptoms are exactly the same, whether or not you are pregnant or not. This is hardly surprising, given the fact that the symptoms of PMS are exactly the same as those of early pregnancy – and that all the hormones you are taking for luteal phase support are the same hormones your body produces during pregnancy !

You need to find ways to cope constructively ! Think of this as a learning opportunity which can test your emotional resilience. Tap into your inner strengths and remember you have dealt with waiting in the past as well – waiting for exam results; or waiting for your boyfriend to call ! The waiting game is exactly the same and learning mind management skills such as yoga and meditation can help ! Keeping yourself gainfully occupied and continuing to work is very useful – this keeps you distracted and allows you to channel your energies constructively !